The Cat with the Fiddle


wide open ramblings after michael jackson’s memorial
July 9, 2009, 7:26 am
Filed under: life, profundity, thinking | Tags: , ,

i’ve been subsisting on small rations these past few months. i think i want to try and catch up with myself today. they say life is too short. i think it isn’t short enough because i still take it for granted. if death were more inevitable than it already is, i think i would appreciate more smaller benefits.

but as it is, more than half my day is deeply embroiled in a rat race of glamorous materials. it reminds me of my crafts projects in grade school when i take dead empty seashells and dip them in glitter.

there are so many things i want to do in addition to the many things i already do. we just put up an advocacy group for parents of children affected by colorectal malformations. i applied again in a language and tutorial center, hoping i could teach english to japanese clients; or algebra to high school children. i want to enroll again in the foreign language class. anything. anything extremely disparate from what i’m doing and from this hollow environment.

are there job openings in any booksellers right now? i can categorize literature. in fact, can i just read allowed to some eccentric old person, just like atticus finch?

anyway, i took a leave yesterday to look after my husband, but i ended up playing jewel quest and eating fried chicken from a bucket most of the day. we watched michael jackson’s memorial service and i admit to succumbing to tears, but only when tito jackson took the microphone. and i like smokey robinson, i really do. he shouldn’t die before i get to meet him, it’s that important.

i can’t understand why i feel so affected by michael’s passing. yes, i am a big fan, maybe even a little bigger than some, but i never imagined his death to feel so personally desolate. like as soon as the jackson brothers wheeled the casket out of staples center, i thought my chest was going to cave in, my throat and nasal cavities just felt as if they were being pulled into some biological vortex. and when i looked at michael’s photos as little michael jackson of the jackson 5 with his brothers, and those camera stills from student canteen the first time he and the his brothers came to the philippines in the 70’s, i can’t help but be reminded of my own childhood and how happy it was for a few years.

growing up is such an unwelcome thing. growing older is more acceptable. i wish i had just packed up one day and jumped into the deep end. i think i have come to the point where mistakes and unnecessary risks are no longer tolerated.

michael jackson’s gone. now what am i going to do next?



“where good ideas are never forgotten”

from my other blog.

what’s a bloo? beats me, but whatever he is, i could certainly use something like him.

i’ve always been crazy about cartoon network, but i think they outdid themselves with foster’s home for imaginary friends. created and produced by craig mccracken (creator of the powerpuff girls), it premiered in august 2004 and ran its final episode in may this year.

main characters coco, frankie, mr. herriman, wilt, eduardo, bloo, madame foster and mac
main characters coco, frankie, mr. herriman, wilt, eduardo, bloo, madame foster and mac

in foster’s home, imaginary friends take on physical form as soon as children create them. sadly though, children outgrow imaginary friends at around seven or eight years old, leaving many of them without a home nor a child to accompany. so elderly madame foster put up a home for abandoned imaginary friends. their motto: “where good ideas are never forgotten.”

just like an orphanage, imaginary friends are up for adoption to good homes, one episode even showing the procedure and documentation involved through “adopt-a-thought saturday”.

adopt-a-thought saturday at foster's home
adopt-a-thought saturday at foster’s home

bloo, however, is not up for adoption, as his creator, mac, holds a special arrangement with foster’s. he visits the home every single day after school, thereby making him persist as bloo’s “child”. mr. herriman, on the other hand, who functions as an administrator for the house, is madame foster’s own imaginary friend from way back when she was a little girl.

mac and bloo in bloo's room (shared by wilt, eduardo and coco)
mac and bloo in bloo’s room (shared by wilt, eduardo and coco)

foster’s fills me with an amazing, though misplaced, sense of belongingness. no matter how strange or how eccentric you are, there will always be a place for you in this world. you will find here your own childhood fantasies: a stable of unicorns (but they’re bad ass thuggish here!), numerous santa clauses during the holidays, and even a prince charming on a noble steed!

filled with both slapstick and dead pan humor and sarcasm, mind-blowing art and a fabulous cast of characters, foster’s will frequently amuse you. but it will warm your heart too, with stories about friends like an “old” imaginary friend (foster’s first resident!) who has been a companion to generations of lonely children. or a weird one with numerous eyes, being a “seeing-eye” friend for a blind little boy.

would you adopt any of these friends?
would you adopt any of these friends?

winner of five (5) emmy awards, five (5) annie awards (animation awards) and nominated for several more, foster’s was named 85th best animated series by ign, calling it “very funny and endearing”. critics praise its characterization and art design, one making special mention of the character “cheese”, saying he is the “quintessence of foster’s surreal charm.”

you are limited only by the extent of your own imagination
you are limited only by the extent of your own imagination

you know who else i would like to see in foster’s home?

charles herman, nobel laureate john nash's "best friend" in "a beautiful mind"
charles herman, john nash’s “best friend” in “a beautiful mind”

wouldn’t that just be awesome?



culminate
June 14, 2009, 1:03 pm
Filed under: moronic escapes, profundity, thinking

long weekend. back from out of town. laptop and big bag of potato chips in bed. rain pattering on the window, cartoons blaring from the tv.

despite all the pain this world is known for, there are just some days when i am convinced that this is indeed a wonderful world.



what it means to another
June 1, 2009, 1:51 am
Filed under: art, moronic escapes, profundity, worldview | Tags: ,

in november last year, i wrote this entry. immediately after i published it, i wrote mr. despain an email:

thank you for creating the exchange. it quite literally took my breath away. (link attached here)

four days later, mr. despain wrote back:

Thanks for writing that wonderful little anecdote and thanks also for sending me the link. It was really touching to read. Though I get a fair bit of fan mail this one ranks up there as one of the best. 

Hope this finds you well,
Brian

it is one thing for an idol to reply to fan mail, and a completely other thing when he replies and says he appreciates what you wrote.

i take comfort in the thought that despite all the pride, the arrogance and the condescension of this world, you can find good in the world of art and talented artists.

i eagerly look forward to other art pieces and artists that would inspire me. never underestimate the beauty of creativity and the power of appreciation.



book fetish (addendum)
May 13, 2009, 4:05 am
Filed under: books, family | Tags: , ,

about two weeks ago, the custom-made bed with shelf headboard was delivered to our flat. since only chief was home to welcome the furniture to our nuclear family, he unloaded books and dvd’s from our renegade balikbayan boxes and proceeded to arrange them in regimental order.

just last week, i decided to browse through the items he arranged and came upon a strange title among the books. the facts behind the helsinki roccamatios, a novel by yann martel (of the life pf pi fame), hardbound, its jacket in pristine condition and the plastic wrap still intact. and i was immediately struck by this heart-warming idea that chief is exerting some effort to read the kinds of stories that i like. so i left it at that.

the facts about the helsinki roccamatios by yann martel

the facts about the helsinki roccamatios by yann martel

then just three days ago, i decided to go up to chief and ask him where he got the book. he looks me over quizzically and says, “it’s not mine.”

i return the puzzled look to say, “it’s not mine either.”

“don’t be absurd, it’s yours.”

“no, it’s not.”

“it’s yours.”

“it can’t be mine. i have no yann martel book of my own.”

“yes you have, and there it is.”

as i quickly pull the book off the shelf, my eyes immediately catch the colors on its jacket and i am suddenly filled with recognition.

“yep, it’s mine, all right.”

this is supposed to join the other books from this sale-frenzied entry.

i think i have a lot of inventorying to do. and some cruel learning that i can’t keep buying books and forgetting about them. oh, those poor things, neglected and so new. they’re just screaming to be taken out of the plastic wrap…

but they were all so beautiful and so tempting on that sale rack, i can’t just leave them there! they need happy homes. like our littered shelf.



there’s no school like the old school
May 6, 2009, 3:15 am
Filed under: entertainment, music, pop

dance

move over, lady gaga. let the old-timer’s show us how it’s done.

snap! is a german-american group formed by german producers michael munzing and luca anzilotti in 1989. the most popularly recognized figure would be rapper turbo b. they brought us the ultimate fight song of the 90’s, the power, which catapulted their first album to rank among the most successful dance albums of all time.

c+c music factory consists of music producers robert clivilles and david cole (thus the name c+c; little did we know this then), but the best-known face would have to be freedom williams’, their lead vocalist or what the we used to call “mc”. with many awards as well as superstar collaborations, the group was and continues to distinguish itself in the dance music industry. this is “gonna make you sweat (everybody dance now)”.

2 unlimited, one of the biggest-selling artists to come out of europe, produced by belgians jean-paul decoster and phil wilde, fronted by the dutch duo of ray slijngaard and anita doth. theirs is one of the most recognizable sounds in dance, their tracks still being widely used in major events and dance competitions today, plus remixed to high heavens. no surprise, many people associate “get ready for this” with sports and cheerdance.

salt-n-pepa, the grammy-winning hip-hop group from new york, are cheryl james (salt), sandra denton (pepa) and dierdra roper (spinderella; how cool and 90’s is that name?). they are one of the largest-selling rap groups of all time, something quite unusual for an all-female trio. their popularity swelled upon the remix of “push it”, giving them their first worldwide hit.

are you on your feet now, doing the new jack swing? come on… you know you want to…



compiling the top whatever greatest comic book heroes and villains
April 30, 2009, 7:34 am
Filed under: books, entertainment, literature, pop | Tags: , ,

lifted from my flippant ditzy blog i am shallow. please don’t judge me. because i am not a book.

stepping out of the cinema on the premier night of x-men origins: wolverine, it suddenly occured to me to ask my husband about his preference: marvel or d.c.? he said he doesn’t take sides on that one.

d.c. vs. marvel. would you like to pick a side?

would you like to pick a side?

well, i lean towards d.c.. but that’s just me. not to say that i don’t like characters outside of the d.c. universe, but if i had to choose just one over the other, my choice is very clear. but, of course, there are other publishers, other remarkable characters which are worth more than your two cents in comic book conversations. and don’t forget manga and their die-hard fanboys.

so with that train of thought starting my morning today, i decided to post some of the lists i have collected, counting down the greatest comic book characters of all time. many just enumerate the top ten, others go as far as two hundred. for this blog’s mediocre purpose, let’s just stick to the top ten or twenty of some of these “hallowed” lists.

the rest of it here.



a funny thing happened on my way to “tipping the velvet”
April 26, 2009, 11:39 pm
Filed under: literature, moronic escapes

i may have lost it a little bit. literary sensibilities that you wouldn’t exactly call astute, but my preferences used to always veer towards written forms. call it an overexposure to commercial retail. or an underexposure to light.

i was searching for reviews on the next book i intended to purchase, tipping the velvet by sarah waters, when my eyes strayed to an ad of all glitz, a make-up palette that promises so much for a price more exorbitant than i’m sure it’s worth. but what the heck, i have to keep my grip on reality, right? and that means sticking to the status quo.

all right, there must be nothing too wrong with being superficial. though sooner or later, material things make me very moody. looking back at some of my entries, i realized i have seemed so morose. this is a bad thing. i do not intend to come off as sad, precisely because i am not.  i am probably just locked into too many unnecessary retail products these days, and they just drag me down. is that weird?

so here: i am not sad. i promise not to heave like the past few entries. i am starting to annoy myself with the emotives, so no more sulking. well, until the next under-creative spell, at least.

eventually, i did end up purchasing tipping the velvet, as well as affinity, by the same author. i have yet to pick up either one to read.



in passing
April 24, 2009, 8:28 am
Filed under: thinking | Tags:

written early in march:

on a day like today, when i can feel a palpable shift of seasons and the sun still bears down on my shoulders at almost 5 in the afternoon, i tend to consider my options.

there are a hundred ways to look at my situation, most of them through antagonistic lens, but i have been sharpened a little bit to rationalize my circumstances, and if there is one thing i cling on to to preserve my senses, it is the belief that everything happens for a purpose. trite, but the faith in causal reasoning provides huge relief.

the retail environment may have eroded some of my penchant for things beyond ordinary. while luxury items are by no means average, they are still just extraordinary things in an ordinary life. not to say, though, that i wouldn’t shoplift all the handbags nor the shoes in the store if there were no legal implications to such actions. just that i have found a fixed viewpoint after all the years of emotional toil, but i don’t think i have the voice to set it out anymore.

i am still waiting for a shaft of light to find me.



worth remembering
April 22, 2009, 10:45 pm
Filed under: life, profundity, relating, thinking

from my old neglected blog: 

there’s something about forgetfulness which brings people back to reason. amnesia occurs to every other bubble-haired heroine in siesta-time telenovelas, so we dream at 3pm that our realities can be distorted beyond recognition. we wish memory weren’t as persistent as that dali portrait of melting clocks.

you might notice that amnesia in telenovelas happen at the most strategic of moments: when the heroine is sick with unbearable longing. pining for her lost love, she listlessly crosses to the middle of what seems like a deserted street when out of nowhere a punk driver/car with breaks busted/ten-wheeler container van swerves sharply from the curbside and knocks her down on the pavement, conveniently tossing her head onto the gutter. as she wakes up to fluorescent lights amidst crisp-linen-looking concerned nurses and medical interns pretending to be busy with checking for vital signs, she is stricken with trepidation that she remembers nothing. shit, not even her own name. then, she is reborn.

she discovers a new love, this time more mature and more wealthy than the root cause of her amnesia. she builds a business empire of some sort and/or becomes a budding superstar while the new paramour looks on beaming with fatherly pride. and then she becomes famous all over mexico/philippines/puerto rico/wherever.

there’s a jim carrey-kate winslet film coming up about a medical procedure that could erase recollections a patient might wish to dispose of. in this movie, kate has all images of jim erased from her memory and jim later follows suit when remembrances of their blissful past proved to be too painful to tolerate.

we could only dream it were that easy.

people try to rework the past by restricting our memories. they commit to flames (quite literally) every object that jolts recollections of a history once held in a position of sensitive merit. they were content. but with dust in their eyes and a swelling in their throats, they linger a little longer as they scrutinize a gradually dying fire that took away every last piece of a putrid past. ashes never really amount to anything special.

personally, i’d rather stack them away where molds would fester them.

but the now-famous telenovela princess, bedecked with glittering gems, hair chopped to a mod bob/jennifer aniston layers, runs into the old flame and is heaved into a stupor of aching remembrance. the face is familiar, but she can’t quite recall where it belongs… and the season ends with a wedding.

the amnesiac ends up with the forgotten.

we could only dream broken hearts were restored in such a fashion. pain would have been but a myth. but we wouldn’t really want that. there would have been less poets and more mortals.